If you can grasp this concept, it will significantly improve your life. It’s about simplifying things in a way that allows us to have choices where we might not have seen any before. It takes away some of the drama, so if that’s your thing, this isn’t for you.
Ultimately, the most important relationship you will have is with yourself. Even if you help others, being balanced and taking care of yourself is crucial to your ability to help others. I understand that some people may not want to continue at this point because exploring how we treat ourselves isn’t enjoyable, but it is the foundation of a good life.
The science bit.
As humans, we receive information through our senses. We are not always aware of all the information we receive. Our awareness depends on who we are, our life experiences, and what that information means. We then act based on our response to the information rather than the situation or thing itself. This process is automatic, which is why we don’t notice it. We are only aware of our emotional response, the images we see, or even what we say to ourselves.
People are different. For some, it’s easier to ignore the response they have, but for others, that response can be pretty intense, which can be difficult for people who do not have such an intense response to acknowledge.
That’s why two people can look at the exact same thing and have a very different response. Have you ever seen someone who has a fear of spiders and observed their reaction? It might not seem real, because the response is personal. Hypothetically, if someone threw a tennis ball towards you right now, you would either automatically catch it or automatically move. This response is learned, just like any other response we have learned.
However, due to the intensity of some people’s experiences, it can be challenging to acknowledge the possibility of overcoming an unwanted response. Some people may not want to accept that we ultimately have the final say in how the world makes us feel and how we respond, which ultimately is ours. Often, the challenge lies in knowing how to manage our internal responses, which can be the cause of the things we do but wish we didn’t.
And this is what therapy tools, CBT, hypnotherapy, mindfulness, and counselling can do. They can help you manage, change or use an unwanted response in a way that empowers you. After all, ultimately, the responses you have in life belong to you!
